5 toxic TRAPS OF CONFLICT

The world would be a better place if we could snap our fingers and get rid of all conflict. Or would it?

Gabe has discovered that our problem isn’t that we have conflict in our organizations, it’s that we go about conflict the wrong way. We fall into the 5 Toxic Traps of Conflict, and even one of them can derail our progress and keep us from reaching our potential.

TRAP #1: THE BULLY

Whether we’re dealing with a bully or inadvertently acting like one ourselves, bullying behavior triggers a fight-or-flight instinctive response in others, shuts down two-way communication, and destroys trust.

TRAP #2: NEED TO WIN

Passion is a hallmark of progress and execution. It drives us, keeps us focused on our goals and gives us the strength to blast through whatever obstacles are in our way. Few worthwhile things are achieved without passion. But sometimes the passion for our need to win becomes more important than the original reason that we wanted to win in the first place. This takes us into truly destructive territory.

TRAP #3: THE LIAR

Some people go through life comfortable with being dishonest. Others lie when caught off guard, have a momentary lapse of judgment, then immediately regret it but lack the courage to course correct. When a lie is recognized by someone else, credibility plummets. The more time that passes between the lie and the recognition of the lie, the worse it gets.

TRAP #4: AVOIDANCE

We often talk about the fight-or-flight response. This is flight. Many organizations create cultures that discourage conflict. People in those cultures don’t speak their mind because it takes too much energy. Even if they see something terribly wrong, they remain silent to avoid dealing with the negative fallout from raising a red flag. When people fall into the avoidance trap, no one sounds the alarm when something bad is about to happen or has already happened.

TRAP #5: JUDGEMENT

Now you know the traps. Ready to learn how to escape them?